Pretty, Happy, Funny, Real in short

This post will be full of subpar pictures I took on my cell phone. But, at least I'm getting a post up!

{Pretty}

Geraniums in this wine barrel were my Mother's Day gift last year. Look how good they are doing!  (I recognize this is only something to celebrate when you are a veteran plant killer like me).

This sweet little girl.

{Happy}

Baptism gowns, washed by Jenny Wren's godmother-to-be in anticipation of her baptism this weekend.

This prickly pear cactus was given to us by a friend, the man who used to teach me US history back when I was a homeschooled 5th-8th grader. The bottom leaf is what he gave us. It came from Luther Burbank's garden, and it has no thorns.  I was told he spoke kindly to this plant always, and prayed over it, and thus it grew without thorns. We have tried to be kind to ours and say some prayers for it, and, indeed, it grew new "leaves" just recently, after being in our garden for about 5 months. The new leaves do have thorns, I am sure we are not as dedicated as Mr. Burbank, and I know there has been a fair share of yelling that takes place in our back yard. But the children are thrilled to see the new growth.

Finally getting caught up on all those thank you notes for everyone's kindness after Jenny Wren's birth.

{Funny}

Sparrow has this funny thing. He does not like chairs to be upright. You can always tell he's been in the room when you see this.

My handsome oldest boy got a hold of my camera phone.

{Real}

My breakfast this morning. Frozen quiche. Reheated two-day-old coffee. Water. However, it was delicious because I was hungry, and I got to eat it on the patio the cool of the morning. As you can guess, I shared the quiche.

We got the dreaded stomach bug. This is Sparrow on day 3 of it. I thought he was done so we went to the park. Alas, not so. But he was a trooper.

A day later and the rest of the family dropped like flies. Oddly enough, despite the sheet washing and bathroom scrubbing and generally feeling awful that had to occur, we actually enjoyed some quiet family time together, doing puzzles when we felt up to it and taking lots and lots of naps. I'm not used to Bluejay and Chickadee sleeping during the day anymore, but they napped wherever they happened to be sitting this time.

Linking up with Suki at Like Mother Like Daughter...

I am linking this post up with 

Baby News!!!

Our little girl, baby numero quattro, surprised this mama by deciding to be born almost three weeks early! In fact, she snuck in the day after her big sister's 4th birthday.  Introducing Little Jenny Wren:

All of my babies so far have been big chunkers, this is my first little baby (6 lbs 2 oz at birth). So that explains the enormous pajamas she's wearing in this picture.  My sweet sister-in-law headed out shopping and sent a huge package of newborn size clothes for her, and now she is more appropriately dressed.  Only I don't have any of those pictures on the laptop yet, of course.

The "big" sister and brothers are so so excited. They love her to pieces and I have to ask them to step back a little when I'm trying to nurse Jenny Wren, since they are always as close to her as they can get.

The birth was amazing, my fourth home birth and my first water birth. After lots of pre-labor the night before, once I actually accepted that she was coming early and went into real labor (which, it seems, just required my finally making that mental adjustment), she was born in an hour and a half. It was my most present labor yet. I remember at one point joking with my midwife between contractions; I had packed a dresser FULL of baby girl clothes, and there were two boy outfits sitting on the bookshelf.  I said "those two are just in case it's a boy".  I was just so sure she was our girl.

Little Jenny Wren has Down syndrome, so these past three weeks have been a whole new experience for us - more doctor appointments (we went to basically NONE with our other babies) and more challenges breastfeeding. We were so blessed to have the home birth, because that saved us from any time in the NICU - she was doing very well that evening and when we took her to the doctor the next day, and so we've been able to just deal with the necessary evaluations without any hospital visits. Most importantly we had an echocardiogram, which showed that her heart is in great shape. Now, I am a full time feeding mama... trying to help this little girl get the eating habit down, and doing lots and lots of pumping. The hardest thing for me has been accepting that she cannot get sufficient nutrition directly from the breast, and that I need to use bottles of pumped milk to achieve that for her. But I've been making lots of milk so no need for formula, I've had some good conversations with other mamas who have been through this, as well as great lactation consultants and I am really hopeful that we can be back primarily breast feeding before this journey is over.  I am very committed to long term breastfeeding with all my children, so this has been a hurdle for me.

My amazing husband has been able to take extra time off work to run the household while I take care of this babe. He has been our rock. 

I have lots more pictures to post of Jenny Wren, her big brothers and sister, and other things that I want to update on this blog (homeschooling! reading! other kiddos!) but just posting this has been a little treat for myself. So, more to come...

PHFR - A Day in the Life - Homeschooling a kindergartener + two littles

I am linking this post up with Like Mother Like Daughter...

...because this day was most certainly ALL of those things.  Also, I have to say, it gave me quite a sense of contentment with everyday life, as well as little bit of enthusiasm, kind of like documenting an experiment in process... Sorry it's a bit of a long one.

[Pretty], [Happy], [Funny], and [Real] are all mixed in.

I thought it would be fun to do another Day in the Life, now that we've started homeschooling.  It will be interesting to compare this to homeschooling a few years from now...

Last night was a bit rough, following a pattern of rough nights in recent days.  Chickadee woke once or twice and Aaron went to her (which is rough in itself, because he gets up so early, and needs all the sleep he can get).  Sparrow woke up around 1, and nursed and fussed for over an hour.  Finally, I gave him a bottle.  He devoured it, hollered with frustration when it was empty and finally fell back to sleep.  I stayed in his little twin bed (with rails) next to him for a good few hours before finally waking and feeling like it was safe to leave.  

Aaron kissed me goodbye around 5:30 (after, like the wonderful husband he is, leaving the kitchen and living room nice and tidy for me to start our day), and I slept in semi-alert state for a little while, until I heard Chickadee crying.  I went and got her and brought her into our bed around 6:20.  A few minutes later we heard Bluejay get up, and he came and joined us.  We cuddled and talked and slept until Sparrow woke at around 7:15, and then Chickadee and Sparrow started our day (Bluejay generally likes another hour in bed when the rest of us are up). 

We nursed and talked and changed diapers and read books for a while, then I said morning prayers, logged in to take care of some bills, and began to get breakfast (around 8) while Sparrow rearranged the rubber bands in a kitchen drawer, and Chickadee had a ballet costume emergency.  She needed to wear her tutu but she was cold and had no leg warmers like real balleters (as she calls them). We solved it with warm tights, leggings and a sweatshirt over her leotard and tutu. Then she helped Sparrow with his rubber band project, which was actually helpful, as she picked them all up off the floor, while I scrambled eggs, cut up potato patties and made my tea. Bluejay woke up somewhere in this and went about his own business. He refused to join us for breakfast. He (like me) can't eat when he just wakes up. Sparrow and Chickadee take after their father and must eat immediately after the labors of sleep, or the world is a terrible place, mainly for everyone around them. Those three are the definition of "hangry".

8:30-9:00 We ate breakfast and watched Sister Vassa on my phone. Bluejay came in and got them all involved in a game of pretending to be babies. I cleared the table and headed off to start my "day in the life" notes. Soon, the "babies" joined me in the garage by the computer. I went to the bedroom to do my ablutions, put on my contacts, make the bed and get dressed. They followed me, continuing to play their baby game, as well as jumping from the changing table to the bed, and sprinkling water from their "bottle" on each other. Sparrow, always close to my leg, occupied himself by taking things out of the trash and throwing them in the toilet. I talked to the "older" kids about how we have to keep our toilet lids closed during this stage in Sparrow's life. They agreed with understanding and gravity. I made my bed and stopped the jumping, so they went to the boy's room to "make"/jump on the bed there. Sparrow stayed by my side and distributed a package of diapers around the room. I got dressed and then convinced Bluejay to finally get dressed. I had Chickadee pick up her dolls and doll clothes so we could start school. Bluejay then decided he was finally hungry, so school start was delayed while he and Chickadee had apples, cheese and cereal. Sparrow, who had been following me around calling out "Maaaaaa, Maaaaa" and "mowk, mowk, mowk, bo-ol" (Mama, milk and bottle) had a bottle to drink while I took some more notes on our day. 

Almost 10:00 AM. Finally, school time. I'm not going to notate it here, as it will be in my Week 5 post, but it took about an hour, and went very well. I will say that I brought the coloring back a notch, as it had gotten too much for Bluejay, and brought the story reading up a notch, and that was a huge success, for both of us. Sparrow joins right in at circle and story time, I love how he plops himself right down in the circle as soon as prayers are done.  He LOVES routine.

After school, Bluejay helped me clean up a little and headed outside with Sparrow, they climbed on things and played with tools. 

Chickadee headed back to change into a NEW leotard, leggings and faux fur boots. Wardrobe changes are important. 

I did the breakfast dishes and made tea. I would like to note again here that this has been an unusually GOOD day. Yesterday, I did not feel well all day, and just slogged through. I may have done a few dishes. I forced myself to keep going, but I really wanted to just lie on the couch all day and feel sorry for myself. And Sparrow felt that it was therefore necessary for him to whine and need me and whine and also whine, all day, while Bluejay and Chickadee got loads of sheets and blankets out of the linen closet and made forts all over the house. And did I mention I felt sorry for myself? And the whining?

11ish. Snack time for me. I sat outside and had chicken salad and bread and cheese and a cup of tea. Sparrow and Chickadee came by and ate all my cheese. Bluejay brought some of Aaron's sharpies and asked to draw with them, which I let him do with great reservations. They all played in the back yard for a while, then Bluejay and Chickadee asked to go to the front yard to do some weeding. 

 

I let them, as long as Sparrow didn't catch on... he hung around and brought me his current favorite book, Chikka Chikka Boom Boom, saying insistently "BOO BOO! BOO BOO!" (which means Boom Boom).

Here he is, saying "Boo' boo'" to me.

After reading I changed his dirty clothes and loaded all the kids in the van. We made a quick trip out to get diapers and a few other essentials - it was right around the time I usually put Sparrow down for a nap, but I don't trust my afternoon energy levels so I thought we'd better go now. I wore Sparrow in the ergo and the other two walked and did not ask to buy things! And I remembered to bring my bag! Score! (plastic bags have been banned in our county, so you have to bring your own, or pay for paper bags at all stores now). Sparrow ate a babyfood squisher on the way home, since I wanted to get a little lunch in him before nap, but knew he was almost out.

12:30 - we got back, I put a show on for the kids and sat in the rocker in the boys room, cuddling and nursing Sparrow to sleep. It didn't take long today.  He was almost asleep by the time we got home.  I transferred him to his bed and logged into my work computer. 

1ish I responded to a few emails and reviewed some data quickly. Aaron called. We got to chat for a short minute. Then I got the kids some lunch. They just wanted snack food, apple sauce and yogurt, and I didn't push it today. I sat down at my other computer and updated my work hours. They came in to ask to watch another show. I said yes! 

While they watched I microwaved a piece of leftover pizza, and tried to get a little more work done, entering new data into the report I'm writing. I got a little bit done, but then Chickadee came in, wanting to change her clothes again. She needed a dress this time. NOT one of the dresses already out in her room. It must be a new one from the closet.  Opening the closet (and her high-pitched voice) woke the baby. I looked at the clock, not even 2 yet. Not a long enough nap. I charged her to STAY QUIET and went into his room, with the vague hope of getting him back to sleep. I lay him back down, got ready to nurse and climbed in the bed next to him. He didn't even try to nurse. I stayed very still and quiet, worrying that Bluejay had gone into the front yard by himself (which I let him do, but only when I can hear/see him from the window). Sparrow went back to sleep! I heard Bluejay whispering my name at the door and prayed he would stay quiet and not open it. I snuck out of bed.  He did not actually need anything. I helped Chickadee put on her dress. Bluejay asked me to work in the front yard with him. I did not want to. It was hot and the sun wears me out fast. I watered a plant and then headed back to the garage to play "bakery" with Chickadee. She got out her little bakery and gave me instructions on how to set it up, and which hedgehogs to put aprons and chef hats on. Bluejay wanted to play, but she didn't want to let him. I gave her a bit of a lecture about how she should be grateful that he wants to play her games with her. I played for a little while, then said I was done, and she let him play. I worked on my blog post and listened to their game. I read a few of my blogs. The game finally ended when Chickadee refused to let Bluejay's characters eat her food. 

This is an "after" shot of the bakery.  I didn't get one when it was all set up and they were playing nicely.

3ish They asked to watch another show and I let them. I went into the living room to take a bit of a break. I watched my own show (The Office) and ate a chocolate mochi. Yummy! They came in right towards the end. Bluejay, who had really not eaten much today, asked for food. I said yes. He asked for cereal. I gave in. He got a big bowl of rice crispies and a cup of keifer and looked through a version of Homer's Odyssey he'd climbed up on a shelf to get. First he said he wanted to learn about ships from this book of ships. Then he asked me lots of question about who the characters in the pictures were, and if they were before Adam and Eve. Then he asked me if God was in his mother's tummy when he made Adam and Eve. Then he asked me why there was a battle in heaven. "Mom, I just want to know the main reason why there was a fight in heaven." He asks me these types of questions all the time now. Talk about homeschooling. Chickadee looked at pictures on my phone and then asked for cereal too. We talk about Odysseus and Telemachus and a great sea voyage. 

3:40 - Chickadee and I go out to get the mail, because she didn't get to yesterday and was very sad about it. There are some ads and an LL Bean catalog. We sit in the back yard and the children read the catalog while I play with my phone. Chickadee starts crying because there is nothing in the catalog she wants to buy. She wants to buy a bath tub for her babies. They start a game which turns into an argument which runs roughly as follows:

C: I am the boss of this game.
B: You are not the boss! God is the boss.
C: Well, I am the boss of this game.
B: You are not the boss! God is the boss of everyone! Even grown-ups.
C: I am the boss!
B: God is the boss! He is even older than dead people!

Somehow this argument gets resolved. I do not understand how. They team up together to take all the cushions off the lawn furniture and rearrange them into some sort of fort. I sigh. Aaron JUST put it all back into shapely order after having been randomly set around the back yard covered with toys and junk and leaves for a few weeks straight. I mention that they will have to put EVERYTHING back when they're done. They agree and proceed with their project. 

Sparrow is STILL ASLEEP!  Sparrow wakes up. 

4:00 I go get him and bring him outside to see the kids. The fort game is going on with mixed success. There are still some issues with one person wanting to run the show and one person not wanting to be told what to do. Sparrow sits in my lap and I pick at his cradle cap like a mama gorilla while Bluejay practices "reading" Chikka Chikka Boom Boom. He has memorized most of it. Chickadee has memorized pretty much all of it, but he gets mad when she tells him the next line. Sparrow gets fed up with my picking at his head and leaves my lap. I call one of my friends. While I'm on the phone something goes on with the jumping on the pillows and Sparrow screams "Naw naw!" Which is the thing he says most these days. There is much crying and yelling by Chickadee. She is always tired at this time of day, but doesn't often nap any more. She wants Bluejay to play her game with her and is mad because he's pretending to sleep and snoring in the fort. She cries louder. Bluejay runs inside to check for daddy's arrival. Chickadee cries because she wants him to play with her. She goes after him. I hear him say "I'm really really sorry I didn't play with you. I'll play with you now". I think what a nice boy he is. She wants to have real breakfast in their game. She wants potatoes and eggs and cereal. I tell her she just had cereal. I get keifer for everyone. Chickadee cries because her cup is not full enough. I take Bluejay's cup and pour some into hers, defying them all to throw a fit. They do not. Chickadee wants apples. There is one apple left in the house and it's the one she was eating earlier. I cut it up. She cries because she doesn't want it cut up and it's brown. I put it on the table. She eats it and drinks her keifer and stops crying. Bluejay starts in on the questions again ("Is there more numbers than a gugol?"). Sparrow gets things out of the kitchen cupboards. 

4:50 - Aaron arrives home! Hurray! Sparrow jumps in his arms and starts saying "Moow! Moow!" He wants Daddy to show him the moon. It's his favorite thing in the world. Aaron goes to take a shower, after saying hello to all of us. I sit outside with the kids. Chickadee continues to melt down. She cries because she wants Bluejay to play with her. She screams because she is stuck. I ask Bluejay if she is really stuck. He says that the table that they moved for fort building is in the way, and there is a pillow in front of the table so she can't move it. I ask him to move the pillow. I ask her to move the table. She screams. I finally come over there and no one is stuck. I pick her up and put her in her room and tell her that everyone, including all of our neighbors, can't listen to her scream anymore. She will have to do it in her room for now. I leave and shut the door. She screams until the door is shut. Then she stops and is completely fine - I'm pretty sure I even saw her try to hide a smile from me. Sparrow sneaks this opportunity to go in the bathroom and open the shower door, where Aaron is still showering. I take him away. I tell Aaron that I promised the kids we would go to Mike's Produce Stand, just down the street, to get apples.  

5:15 After his shower, we load all the kids in the van to get apples. I try to put the key in the ignition and it won't go in. I panic. Aaron tells me to turn the stearing wheel. It still won't go in. More panic, something is wrong with our van. Aaron tells me I have the keys to the wrong car. Sparrow sees the moon. He shouts "Moow! moow! moow! moow!" all the way to the produce stand. We occasionally acknowledge that yes, that is the moon, and he is satisfied. The kids are making plans to buy honey sticks. We get lots of apples, and they pick out their honey sticks. The girl at the register admires all of their eyelashes.  This happens everywhere we go. We load back in the van and head home. Aaron puts a show on for the kids while I get dinner. Sparrow sits with him and reads Chikka Chikka Boom Boom. When we like something around here, we are serious about it, at least for a week or so. I make salad and put chicken drummies and vegetable samosas in the oven. That's the extent of my cooking generally, these days. Their show ends just in time for dinner and they sit down at the table while I'm finishing up.

6:00 Chickadee asks what is for dinner. I tell her. She asks if they are dinosaur chicken nuggets. I say no, they are drummies. She starts to cry. Aaron gets them all fizzy water while I serve up the plates. Everyone eats their chicken, even Chickadee. Aaron is tired. Sparrow says he is done right away, but Chickadee hand feeds him his chicken and he eats it. Bluejay clears his plate and the kids go outside. Aaron rests for a minute and I show him our shopping scores finds and update him on our day. Then the kids start calling for him. He goes to them and I deconstruct the fort and set the chairs back together.

7:00 Aaron goes to lie down with an ice pack while the kids play outside and I work on my blog. Bluejay is digging a trench and Chickadee is planting seeds. I get Sparrow and put him in the bath (which he loves). I remake Bluejay's bed, which he had completely stripped during the morning jumping. Bluejay and Chickadee come in. I ask if either would like to get in the bath with Sparrow, Chickadee declines because she does not want a bath with boys tonight. Bluejay gets in. I go clear the table and start the dishes. Bluejay shouts with excitement that Sparrow pooped in the potty! Indeed, he had climbed out of the bath and done his business in the appropriate place. General excitement ensues. Aaron goes to take care of it and I start making his lunch for tomorrow. Chickadee visits me. The boys get out and everyone wants food. They get cheese crackers. Aaron puts Chickadee in the bath, and then sits at the table with me. We breathe. The boys come in and Sparrow is still naked. Aaron goes to put a diaper on him. He comes back and as he sits down, Chickadee shouts that Sparrow has gotten in the bath tub with his diaper on. I go get him out and change him again, while telling Chickadee to empty the tub to prevent further mishap. I put on his pajamas despite his strong protestation. Aaron takes Chickadee out and puts on her pjs, the kids brush their teeth and play hide and seek in the house. I brush MY teeth and put on my pjs. Lights are turned off.

8:00 Bedtime. Aaron takes Sparrow off to bed. I read a chapter of Little House in the Big Woods to the other two, while they each have a glass of milk and half a newton. I tell Bluejay I am taking Chickadee to bed and he needs to find a book to look at while I do that. He is a little sad to be alone (even though we do this every night), so I take him to our bed and get him set up. He brings his glass of milk and spills it all over the floor, Aaron's clothes and a curtain. I clean it up. Chickadee calls to me from her room because I'm taking so long. I shush her from the other room, knowing that Sparrow is not cooperating with Aaron and will use any noise as an excuse to avoid sleeping. I get Bluejay set up and climb in bed with Chickadee. We say a prayer and she is asleep in a few minutes. I sneak out of her bed just as Aaron is leaving the boys room. We go in to Bluejay, and Sparrow wakes up. Aaron goes back to him. I go in the living room and turn off the last lights, shut the sliders, etc. Aaron comes back and and we tell Bluejay needs to go to bed. I offer to go with him, since I know Aaron is extra tired today. He says he doesn't need me and can go to bed by himself. Aaron and I get in bed. Bluejay comes back. He says he is cold. I get a blanket and go tuck him in and whisper his prayer with him.

9:00 Aaron and I get in bed and turn off the lights. We talk for a few minutes, and go to sleep.

THE END.

PHFR - What it REALLY Looks Like

I've been really pleased that despite being in the adjustment period of adding a newborn to two toddlers age 3 and under, the house has been relatively tidy at the end of every day.  HOWEVER, I felt it behooved me to document a little more of the reality of the situation - partly just to make Aaron laugh when he gets home.  This is a quick post to show what our house REALLY looks like, at least before the baby naps every day.  And he doesn't usually take a solid nap until after 11:00 so this is most of our day.  

{Pretty} and {Happy} and maybe even a little {Funny}

This sweet babe.  I put Chickadee's hat on him while he was in the baby carrier so I could run out and take the diapers off the line.  It used to be my hat when I was a little girl.  I think he's manly enough to pull it off.

{REAL} and {Funny}

The children's bathroom.  I need to find a child lock for the medicine cabinet.  I already don't keep anything too toxic in there, but this morning while ostensibly going to put on pants Chickadee climbed in the sink and got into the cabinet.

The office.  Not bad, not bad.  Just some trains, books, a baseball hat and a jelly fish stuffed animal on my work desk.

The living room.  Also not bad - I got all the laundry (that was currently done) folded and put away yesterday, so just toys are out.

Oh yes, and the top of my desk.

Dining room and kitchen.  I HAVE to get the kitchen tidy to think straight.  It's almost always the first thing I clean up.  Because whatever else happens, these people need to eat.  And I do too.  Sparrow has gained 2 1/2 lbs since birth.  That's in less than 4 weeks.  I have never been this hungry, and so far, I'm still LOSING weight.  This mama has to eat!

And last but not least, the garage-turned-play-room.  Note the children NOT fully naked.  This is also a victory.  Why is it so hard to get toddlers to keep their clothes on?  This is something I generally give up on at some point during the day.  Daddy usually gets home to children in various states of undress.

What's funny and real in your world these days?  

The Third Trimester Begins

I've been wanting to put up a new post for the past few weeks, ideas float around and then disperse into pieces of ideas, vague memories of having had an idea, or an occasional word, hanging there alone without it's string of context.  I realized that I have reached that stage in my pregnancy where I am much less mentally present, and yet much more physically and emotionally at one with my surroundings, with what Bluejay calls "the beautiful world".  This is a lovely and disconcerting place to be.  Driving has become an exercise in focus.  I find myself noticing the hillside on my left, or light on the grass, or sheep in a vineyard, and when I glance back at the road, I have no idea for how long I was being a sheep in a vineyard or a ray of light on the hillside as opposed to a 30 something (ahem) mom driving a minivan to preschool pick-up.

People talk to me and I hear them, I really do, but when they are done, I cannot often tell you what they said.  The children are very understanding and forgiving of this.  I think I am more in tune with their way of being part of the world.  Even when I forget, the moment after he tells me, that Bluejay is stuck and needs my help, he just tolerantly, if somewhat more urgently, reminds me.

I have found that this altered state of consciousness makes it, not easier, but perhaps more compelling, to concentrate on spiritual growth.  I do not mean that suddenly I am "growing spiritually", oh wonderful, look at me (although pride is one of my great failings), but that I am finding myself aware of the possibilities for growth, and actually able to notice the rewards of grace that accompany such effort.  It took some serious searching through my mind's archive to remember where this came from, but I believe it was something I read on Matushka Anna's blog that lead me to think, not so much about learning to address my personal neuroses, or psychoses, or whatever, but rather to ask God, not to remove, but to give me the grace to bear certain burdens.  Anyway, this stuck in my mind, became a part of my current world, while it's source, it's context even, floated away.  And, when I came across a situation and this small piece of the wisdom of a spiritual father was available to me, in one attempt, one painful, difficult attempt, this was rewarded, with grace.  

I am sure this post is also reflective of my state, I can't remember when to use it's versus its, I don't recognize the letter order of the word consciousness, and I don't have any motivation to look them up, even though normally I gleefully like to relearn grammar rules.  We made an unplanned trip to The City today and boy was it beautiful.  Some of these pictures are from little adventure.